I have no pictures because I didn't want to ruin the wonderful moment---- after 9 months of refusing, the word refusing doesn't even began to tell the extent of it, Reece took a real bath in the bathtub for over 15 minutes with his sisters! You have no idea how AMAZING this is!!!!!
You see, bathtime use to be one of Reece's most favorite times of the day. He's absolutely loved it every since he was a little, tiny baby. In fact, when he first became autistic and Lindy was a baby, if he was getting too wild or throwing a tantrum, I'd put him in the tub and let him play for an hour while I sat on the floor in the bathroom and took a breather (and nursed Lindy!). Well, last March we moved. We'd lived in the same house for the last 8 years, so it was the only home Reece had ever known. He seemed to handle the move just fine (it was only 3 miles away from the old house) and happily took a bath in the new and different tub for the first couple weeks. And then, one night, he just refused. I mean, absolutely, threw a knock-down-drag-'em-out fight when it was time to take a bath! For about a week, we really fought him on it. But, he's getting just big enough that he's very hard to manhandle and he's super strong! (although you'd never guess it by looking at his toothpick arms!) He would still use the toilet and stand at the sink and brush his teeth, but he wouldn't get within 2 feet of that tub. So, I got out a metal bowl and a washcloth and gave him a sponge bath in the hallway. We did this for months. Gradually, we moved him back into the bathroom and eventually, he would sit next to the tub and take his sponge bath. Washing his hair was a huge, gigantic problem, but thankfully it was summer time, so he went swimming alot :-) Chlorine is a disinfectant, right? Anyway, after our Labor Day camping trip where he took an outdoors bath in a Rubbermaid tote, I decided to see if he'd do that at home. I put it in the tub and put water in it and bubbles and bought some cool funnels. For the last 3 months, he would sit on the side of the tub and dip his feet in, but I figured this was major progress!! Then, 2 weeks ago, he actually SAT in the tote!!!! HUGE progress!!!!!!! We were thrilled! And then, tonight, totally out of the blue, as the girls were filling the bathtub for their bath, he told me wanted to take one with them! I figured that once he stripped down and realized they were actually in that dreaded bathtub, that he would chicken out. But, NOPE! He hopped right in like he'd never had a problem with before in his life! AMAZING!!!! I tell ya what, God is GOOD!!!
As a side note- I just finished reading the Karen Kingsbury book "Unlocked" about a boy with autism. I cried and cried and cried my way through, but it was awesome. She totally nailed the feelings of a mother with an autistic child. The boy in the book was 18 and it's based off of a real-life autistic boy that Karen Kingsbury knows. Crazy as it may sound, this fiction book gave me so much hope for Reece's future and renewed in me that God is here, He's with us on our Autism Journey, and He's not only watching, but He's participating!!! PRAISE GOD!
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Monday, November 29, 2010
Cold/Flu Remedy
Hey, just wanted to do a quick post of an awesome herb for this winter!!! I've told several people about this (including our accountant :-) and I decided since this seems to be the best kept secret since I-don't-know-what, I'd share it. OK, you want to know what the miracle cure/preventive for colds, flu, sinus infections and anything else caused by viruses, bacteria or fungi is????
OLIVE LEAF EXTRACT
Yup, you read that right. Apparently the olive tree has some really awesome properties, besides just the olives and the oil. (Kind of ironic that it's a common tree in Israel- The Promised Land. God's pretty amazing, isn't He?). The leaves of the tree have anti-viral, anti-bacterial, and anti-fungal properties.
Let me give you my history with this herb......
Four years ago when we started on our Autism Journey with dear Reece, we discovered that he had a major yeast overgrowth in his intestines (found through labs done with our DAN! doctor). He was suppose to take olive leaf extract to fight it, but at the time, all I could find were these big, honkin' capsules that a little four-year-old boy could not (refused!) swallow. You couldn't break open the capsule and disguise it with anything either because of the rather unpleasant, potent taste. So, I put the big bottle at the back of my cabinet and used other methods (which, by the way, was a low-sugar diet, biotin, and major probiotics). We kicked the yeast and moved on. Well, when Lindy was just at a year old, I developed a major sinus infection. I saw our family doctor, who prescribed an antibiotic, which I took and, which got rid of the infection. The side effect was that since I was still nursing her, I either had to quit for a week and just wean her completely. Even though I wasn't ready, I weaned her. So, a year and a half later, I was getting ready for a very sad and emotional trip to northern Nebraska to attend my uncle's funeral. We were leaving at the beginning of the week, so that Sunday I was trying to get the house in order (Jeff and the twins stayed home) and pack for me and Lindy. I could tell I was developing another sinus infection (the pain in my jaw, teeth and sinuses, plus the green snot was a dead giveaway), but, being a Sunday, I chose to ignore it. We were leaving at 8 am the next morning, so no hope of going to the doctor. On a whim, I dug out the olive leaf extract, and that morning took 3 capsules. By noon, I was feeling a bit better, so I took 3 more. By evening, the pain was gone in my face. I took 3 more before bed. I woke up the next morning with clear mucus. I continued to take another 9 capsules that day and by night the sinus infection WAS GONE! I mean, completely GONE! I couldn't believe it! So, ever since then, I have been a firm believer in the power of herbs. We keep some on hand at all times. I've even convinced my mother-in-law. As soon as I feel the beginning of a cold or something else coming on, I hit the olive leaf and I rarely develop a full blown infection of anything. Finally, this winter, I learned how to make a liquid herbal tincture using dried olive leaves, so now my kids can have some.
So, there you have it. Go to your nearest health food store and pick up some olive leaf. It's a whole lot easier than getting sick and treating the symptoms :-)
Friday, November 12, 2010
The Evils of Soy
OK, I just got done checking out an autism forum (gfcfdiet.com, if anyone's interested!) and there was a thread on there about the real soy story. And that got me thinking about farming, and soy, and Monsanto and our idiot FDA. Apparently, most people don't realize the hidden dangers and how much soy is really in our food. For almost 3 years, we were a completely soy free family and let me tell you, it's HARD! You have to be vigilant about labels and soy will creep up in the most unforeseen places. When we put Reece back on a normal diet, I quit reading labels quite so closely, but I generally know what's soy-free and what's not. But, it seems so oxymoron-ish of me because my husband, father, father-in-law and a slew of uncles, are all soybean farmers!!! Except that I feel like us farmers are actually the victims in this whole drama. Its a case of conspiracies and good ol' supply and demand.
First of all, the dangers of soy- Soy is one of the most common allergens. Its also a hormone disrupter for men and women, and actually does not contain the health benefits touted by the advertising agencies and the USDA and the FDA and the soybean check off people. If you read the studies closely, the ones that were done to supposedly prove that it lowers cholesterol, prevents heart disease, etc. ,etc. you'll actually find that the results were inconclusive at best. Did you know that, technically, soy only has FDA approval for use in cardboard boxes? Yeah.... and that to use soy in food it has to go through such a process that its impossible to recreate in the regular kitchen? And we eat this stuff... happily, too! Soy is found in almost every type of food that comes in a package. And we feed it to our babies!!! Even if you don't/didn't use soy formula, did you know its in rice cereal? Yup, rice cereal and oatmeal has SOY in it. Now, you can buy the organic version and then it tends to be soy-free. I had a friend once whose son had been breastfed and when he was 6 months old they started him on rice cereal. She was one of those first-time mommies that tried to do everything by the modern book. After a week or so of rice cereal and having a horrible, screaming baby on her hands, she decided to stop the cereal, but she still couldn't figure out why he cried and screamed so much during that time. So, a week or so later, she gave him rice cereal again and again, same reaction. She finally figured out it was the cereal, but still had no idea WHY. OK, fast forward a few years. Her son had had chronic diarrhea his whole, short life and after getting her husband diagnosed with celiac, she decided to also put her son on a gluten-free diet. Still didn't help. About this time, Reece got all of his many food intolerances diagnosed and I had started my deep research into the world of soy. I suggested she also take out soy and dairy. To make a long story short, she got him officially tested and it came back that he was allergic to dairy, gluten and soy. One day, when we were talking about his babyhood, she told me the rice cereal story. On a hunch, I out my unused box of baby rice cereal and read the ingredients.... sure enough, my hunch was confirmed. He had been reacting to the soy in the box!
Unfortunately, for us farmers, if you wanna make money, you gotta grow what makes sense (or "cents!). Right now beans are at $11 and our yield this fall were really good. Soybeans make us money most years. That's a fact. The price is so high, because to put it simply, people demand it! Oh, I know, you don't walk down the street shouting, "We want soy! We want soy!" but you do say it with your spending habits. Anytime you frequent a fast food restaurant or eat almost any food from a can, box, or package (including meats!) you are further fueling the demand and we answer with the supply.
Then, to top it all off, Monsanto makes it so easy (kinda, anyway) for us to grow it! Round-up Ready (or genetically modified organisms) have made growing soybeans a piece of cake, until this year anyway (more on that in a bit!). All we have to do is plant (the horribly expensive-because-you-have-to-pay-unreal-tech-fees-so-Monsanto-doesn't-throw-you-in-jail) seed, spray it a few times with glyphosate (Round-up) and viola! you have money in the bank. One big catch is, though, you CANNOT save your seed or Monsanto will jail you, seriously. So, you buy new seed every year so you can the convenience of "easy" money. But, something somewhat unforeseen happened this year that's thrown farmers, seed companies, and chemical companies for a loop- several key weeds developed a resistance to Round-up. Specifically, marestail, waterhemp, and pigweed. Now we have to throw bigger, "badder" chemicals at it to get the same result. Hence, resulting in added pollution, cancer, and all sorts of other modern maladies. Plus, its more expensive.
So, the bottom line is, if you consumers would QUIT consuming soy (do your own research and you'll see why its so bad for you!), we farmers would quit growing it and the world would be a much happier place. And cows, pigs and chickens everywhere who are forced to eat this crap would thank you also!
And that is my rant of the day...... Hope you learned something, or at least are intrigued enough to educate yourself on the subject, instead of just blindly following the masses.....
First of all, the dangers of soy- Soy is one of the most common allergens. Its also a hormone disrupter for men and women, and actually does not contain the health benefits touted by the advertising agencies and the USDA and the FDA and the soybean check off people. If you read the studies closely, the ones that were done to supposedly prove that it lowers cholesterol, prevents heart disease, etc. ,etc. you'll actually find that the results were inconclusive at best. Did you know that, technically, soy only has FDA approval for use in cardboard boxes? Yeah.... and that to use soy in food it has to go through such a process that its impossible to recreate in the regular kitchen? And we eat this stuff... happily, too! Soy is found in almost every type of food that comes in a package. And we feed it to our babies!!! Even if you don't/didn't use soy formula, did you know its in rice cereal? Yup, rice cereal and oatmeal has SOY in it. Now, you can buy the organic version and then it tends to be soy-free. I had a friend once whose son had been breastfed and when he was 6 months old they started him on rice cereal. She was one of those first-time mommies that tried to do everything by the modern book. After a week or so of rice cereal and having a horrible, screaming baby on her hands, she decided to stop the cereal, but she still couldn't figure out why he cried and screamed so much during that time. So, a week or so later, she gave him rice cereal again and again, same reaction. She finally figured out it was the cereal, but still had no idea WHY. OK, fast forward a few years. Her son had had chronic diarrhea his whole, short life and after getting her husband diagnosed with celiac, she decided to also put her son on a gluten-free diet. Still didn't help. About this time, Reece got all of his many food intolerances diagnosed and I had started my deep research into the world of soy. I suggested she also take out soy and dairy. To make a long story short, she got him officially tested and it came back that he was allergic to dairy, gluten and soy. One day, when we were talking about his babyhood, she told me the rice cereal story. On a hunch, I out my unused box of baby rice cereal and read the ingredients.... sure enough, my hunch was confirmed. He had been reacting to the soy in the box!
Unfortunately, for us farmers, if you wanna make money, you gotta grow what makes sense (or "cents!). Right now beans are at $11 and our yield this fall were really good. Soybeans make us money most years. That's a fact. The price is so high, because to put it simply, people demand it! Oh, I know, you don't walk down the street shouting, "We want soy! We want soy!" but you do say it with your spending habits. Anytime you frequent a fast food restaurant or eat almost any food from a can, box, or package (including meats!) you are further fueling the demand and we answer with the supply.
Then, to top it all off, Monsanto makes it so easy (kinda, anyway) for us to grow it! Round-up Ready (or genetically modified organisms) have made growing soybeans a piece of cake, until this year anyway (more on that in a bit!). All we have to do is plant (the horribly expensive-because-you-have-to-pay-unreal-tech-fees-so-Monsanto-doesn't-throw-you-in-jail) seed, spray it a few times with glyphosate (Round-up) and viola! you have money in the bank. One big catch is, though, you CANNOT save your seed or Monsanto will jail you, seriously. So, you buy new seed every year so you can the convenience of "easy" money. But, something somewhat unforeseen happened this year that's thrown farmers, seed companies, and chemical companies for a loop- several key weeds developed a resistance to Round-up. Specifically, marestail, waterhemp, and pigweed. Now we have to throw bigger, "badder" chemicals at it to get the same result. Hence, resulting in added pollution, cancer, and all sorts of other modern maladies. Plus, its more expensive.
So, the bottom line is, if you consumers would QUIT consuming soy (do your own research and you'll see why its so bad for you!), we farmers would quit growing it and the world would be a much happier place. And cows, pigs and chickens everywhere who are forced to eat this crap would thank you also!
And that is my rant of the day...... Hope you learned something, or at least are intrigued enough to educate yourself on the subject, instead of just blindly following the masses.....
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
A Glimpse into our Daily Life
There hasn't been any earth shattering news around here, so I thought I'd do a post of the mundane of the Donley family! You know, "a day in the life of..." So, here goes....
Reece and I always get up first around 6:45. We discovered awhile back, that when there's absolutely NO wind, we can get in Channel 8! Woo-hoo! And at 7 am, Curious George is on :-) My kids have been Curious George fans since they were itty-bitty. We have most of the books and, even at 8 years old, the twins still enjoy listening to them. So, between 7 and 8, the girls trail in. We all eat breakfast at various points during this time. Usually at 8, the TV is turned off and doesn't get turned back on until the next morning. We're just not big TV watchers. Most mornings, I have students coming over at 9 for tutoring, so the kids all get clothes changed, teeth brushed, etc, before my students arrive. I also make sure Jeff is up and at 'em before 9. He works 2nd and has a hard time winding down, so his bedtime is around 2 am or so. Anyway, while I tutor, the kids play. When its warm (or even when its not!) the girls usually go outside first thing to visit all their cats. Originally, we had 8, but due to various different accidents involving vehicles and coyotes, we're now down to about 4 or so. After tutoring is over I'll do a few chores, make the kids do a few chores and start dinner. We eat at noon and Reece goes to school at 1. Jeff leaves for work at 1:45 and the girls and I do school while Reece is gone. Elisa's very fast, so we are almost always done by 3. After Reece gets home, we eat a snack and most everyone plays outside (including me!). Yesterday, I worked on hauling cow manure to my garden from the loafing shed. I'm working on getting my gardens ready for next spring. Sometimes we run farm errands at various points of the day. By "farm errands", I mean picking up my father-in-law and/or Jeff and taking them somewhere else. During bean harvest a few weeks ago, I ran the combine some while my father-in-law took the semi to the elevator. Once milo harvest starts (soon, I hope!) I'll be doing that again and then as soon as we start stripping cotton, I'll be out in the cotton field running the boll buggy and module builder. The kids, of course, always tag along for all of this! As farm kids, they're VERY use to the interruptions and changes in routine that farming can bring. Anyway, back to my day.... so, we eat supper around 6 or so and then we'll play/pick up the livingroom/clear the table. Finally, we have baths, Bible story, prayer time and bed! In the fall and winter, they are in bed by 8 pm, but in the summer, its usually 9 pm. We have a very strict bedtime routine that has been the same since the twins were babies and we rarely deviate! A lot of times, in addition to the Bible story, we'll read a chapter out of a chapter book. We recently finished an abridged version of "Huck Finn". Several years ago, we spent 9 months and read through the "Little House on the Prairie" series. Anyway, my day sounds rather boring when its all typed out, but it sure seems busy to us!!
Reece and I always get up first around 6:45. We discovered awhile back, that when there's absolutely NO wind, we can get in Channel 8! Woo-hoo! And at 7 am, Curious George is on :-) My kids have been Curious George fans since they were itty-bitty. We have most of the books and, even at 8 years old, the twins still enjoy listening to them. So, between 7 and 8, the girls trail in. We all eat breakfast at various points during this time. Usually at 8, the TV is turned off and doesn't get turned back on until the next morning. We're just not big TV watchers. Most mornings, I have students coming over at 9 for tutoring, so the kids all get clothes changed, teeth brushed, etc, before my students arrive. I also make sure Jeff is up and at 'em before 9. He works 2nd and has a hard time winding down, so his bedtime is around 2 am or so. Anyway, while I tutor, the kids play. When its warm (or even when its not!) the girls usually go outside first thing to visit all their cats. Originally, we had 8, but due to various different accidents involving vehicles and coyotes, we're now down to about 4 or so. After tutoring is over I'll do a few chores, make the kids do a few chores and start dinner. We eat at noon and Reece goes to school at 1. Jeff leaves for work at 1:45 and the girls and I do school while Reece is gone. Elisa's very fast, so we are almost always done by 3. After Reece gets home, we eat a snack and most everyone plays outside (including me!). Yesterday, I worked on hauling cow manure to my garden from the loafing shed. I'm working on getting my gardens ready for next spring. Sometimes we run farm errands at various points of the day. By "farm errands", I mean picking up my father-in-law and/or Jeff and taking them somewhere else. During bean harvest a few weeks ago, I ran the combine some while my father-in-law took the semi to the elevator. Once milo harvest starts (soon, I hope!) I'll be doing that again and then as soon as we start stripping cotton, I'll be out in the cotton field running the boll buggy and module builder. The kids, of course, always tag along for all of this! As farm kids, they're VERY use to the interruptions and changes in routine that farming can bring. Anyway, back to my day.... so, we eat supper around 6 or so and then we'll play/pick up the livingroom/clear the table. Finally, we have baths, Bible story, prayer time and bed! In the fall and winter, they are in bed by 8 pm, but in the summer, its usually 9 pm. We have a very strict bedtime routine that has been the same since the twins were babies and we rarely deviate! A lot of times, in addition to the Bible story, we'll read a chapter out of a chapter book. We recently finished an abridged version of "Huck Finn". Several years ago, we spent 9 months and read through the "Little House on the Prairie" series. Anyway, my day sounds rather boring when its all typed out, but it sure seems busy to us!!
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Zzzzzzzz....................
That is what Reece has been doing 9-11 hours a night for the last 10 nights!!!!!!! On the Friday after my last post, a few ladies came to my house and we prayed over Reece and anointed him with oil. God heard our prayers and answered in a most positive way!!! We gave up on the prescription meds and I was at my wits end with his sleeping. Earlier in the week, I started dinking around with melatonin again, but Reece still wasn't sleeping much. After our earnest prayer session, evenings and nights have been WONDERFUL!!! It is soooooo amazing to see God work like that so immediately and in such a way that it gave the other ladies goosebumps. (I was just so happy to have my energy back :-) I've been praising God nightly for this continuing miracle.
Overall, Reece is a happier kid during the day, but we still have our hurdles to overcome. I feel like our discipline needs to be stepped up a notch. I think that, too often, we let bad behavior and disobedience slide with him and blame things on "the autism." The Lord is very clear on using spanking as a means of training for children and it seems to be the only thing that Reece understands when administered after a bad deed or behavior. I have been doing a much better job of keeping wooden spoons (our rod of choice) around the house and using them in a very calm, concise manner. For instance, I'll tell him (very calmly), "Reece, you disobeyed me. I told you to put your socks on and you did not. Now you get 2 spankings." I'll count out the two (or whatever number we deem necessary for the offense) and then we move on. And, you know what? Reece complies very happily after that and life is good :-)
I know this isn't a very long post (normally, I'm much windier :-) but, its 10:30 and we have the pumpkin patch awaiting us tomorrow, so I'm thinking I better head to bed.
I'll leave you with a parting quote from Elisa.....
Overall, Reece is a happier kid during the day, but we still have our hurdles to overcome. I feel like our discipline needs to be stepped up a notch. I think that, too often, we let bad behavior and disobedience slide with him and blame things on "the autism." The Lord is very clear on using spanking as a means of training for children and it seems to be the only thing that Reece understands when administered after a bad deed or behavior. I have been doing a much better job of keeping wooden spoons (our rod of choice) around the house and using them in a very calm, concise manner. For instance, I'll tell him (very calmly), "Reece, you disobeyed me. I told you to put your socks on and you did not. Now you get 2 spankings." I'll count out the two (or whatever number we deem necessary for the offense) and then we move on. And, you know what? Reece complies very happily after that and life is good :-)
I know this isn't a very long post (normally, I'm much windier :-) but, its 10:30 and we have the pumpkin patch awaiting us tomorrow, so I'm thinking I better head to bed.
I'll leave you with a parting quote from Elisa.....
"One of the things I love most about my life is killing chickens!"
Ha, ha, ha!! That's a farmgirl for ya..... :-)
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
One Note at a Time....
Today I learned some very interesting truths about myself. Things that I had never noticed, exactly, but that had kind of been nibbling at the back of my brain. They have now been put into words and it was rather heartbreaking to realize....
We've been struggling the last few weeks (but its been an ongoing off again/on again issue for the last few years!) with Reece and his sleeping. After trying a prescription med only to have his sleeping get worse and worse, we feel at our wit's end. This morning, Reece and I started our morning at 2 AM! Yes, you read that right... Reece woke up at 2 am and NEVER went back to sleep!!! I didn't want to burden Jeff with it since he's swamped with haying and his regular job, so I dealt with it. By the time I woke Jeff up at 9 am, I had about had it. I was beyond exhausted, felt like I had no support (other than my dear husband!) and didn't know where to turn. It shouldn't have surprised me when a very close friend called at that very moment. I almost didn't answer the phone. I really didn't want to talk about ANYthing and I knew she would ask about Reece. But, I answered anyway.....
After telling her about our horrible night, she suggested that a group of women that she and I know get together and pray over him. Just the thought of it sent peace surging through my body. "Yes!" I thought, "Getting these prayer warriors all together with Reece would be just the thing!" We decided that I would call one of the ladies and she would call the others. So, I made my phone call.
And this is where I learned my lesson....
After pouring my heart out to this woman and rehashing my spiritual journey that has occurred simultaneously with my autism journey, I realized something....I had never REALLY trusted God with Reece!
For someone who considers herself to have a close relationship with the Lord, it was disconcerting. See, I'm a very smart, self-educated (with a few years of college thrown in!) person and for the last 4 years, while I prayed for a miracle cure for Reece, I felt like I was the one who had to figure out what that cure was. I was trusting my intellect and my researching skills and my love of science and medicine to make my son "normal."
And then she asked me something else....
"Have you ever thanked God for the autism? He's the one who has created Reece as He did."
Boy! Thanked God for AUTISM????? Was she NUTS?? Autism was my enemy, my nemesis, my thorn, my broken bridge to the Land of Normal.... Why the HECK would I be THANKFUL for it???? But, another truth began to dawn on my heart.... I daily thank God for my son, Reece, but you know what? Autism, no matter how much I don't want it to be there, is part of Reece. It is part of this family and it is shaping what kind of person I become, what Jeff will become and what kind of women my girls grow up to be. But, you know what? God has allowed autism to become part of Reece and by viewing it as my enemy, am I telling God that what He's created is not good enough???
And, then finally, my last lesson that I learned....
For the last 4 years, I have focused on the BIG PICTURE. What will Reece be like in a couple years.... in 5 years.... in 10 years..... yet, do I have any idea what Reece what kind of man he'll become? No, of course not. I have been so focused on curing him and making him normal so that he can lead a "normal" life as an adult, that I've forgotten that our lives are like a Mozart concerto....
I was a violinist (I say "was" because the violin got put on the backburner once the twins arrived!). I actually had a violin scholarship to college. I was pretty good. But, I remember the feeling when my teacher would hand me a new sheet of music. I'd look at it, gulp, and immediately feel stressed out and discouraged... all before I'd ever picked up my bow! But, if I broke it down, played one note at a time, eventually I got through it and each time I played it, I got a little better and a little better, until finally, it was mastered and ready to perform. I need to remember in life, to take one note at a time, instead of stressing about being able to play the whole piece perfectly the first time through. Only one note, then another, then another, until someday... I'll be standing before the King playing my masterpiece!
I leave you with my new strength that has helped me get through this day...
"Rejoice in the Lord, always. And, again, I say, rejoice!" Phillipians 4:4.
I will REJOICE in Reece and I will REJOICE in autism and I will REJOICE that the Lord chose Jeff and I to go through these daily struggles. Because without these our lives would be too perfect, and how would we ever truly learn to trust?
We've been struggling the last few weeks (but its been an ongoing off again/on again issue for the last few years!) with Reece and his sleeping. After trying a prescription med only to have his sleeping get worse and worse, we feel at our wit's end. This morning, Reece and I started our morning at 2 AM! Yes, you read that right... Reece woke up at 2 am and NEVER went back to sleep!!! I didn't want to burden Jeff with it since he's swamped with haying and his regular job, so I dealt with it. By the time I woke Jeff up at 9 am, I had about had it. I was beyond exhausted, felt like I had no support (other than my dear husband!) and didn't know where to turn. It shouldn't have surprised me when a very close friend called at that very moment. I almost didn't answer the phone. I really didn't want to talk about ANYthing and I knew she would ask about Reece. But, I answered anyway.....
After telling her about our horrible night, she suggested that a group of women that she and I know get together and pray over him. Just the thought of it sent peace surging through my body. "Yes!" I thought, "Getting these prayer warriors all together with Reece would be just the thing!" We decided that I would call one of the ladies and she would call the others. So, I made my phone call.
And this is where I learned my lesson....
After pouring my heart out to this woman and rehashing my spiritual journey that has occurred simultaneously with my autism journey, I realized something....I had never REALLY trusted God with Reece!
For someone who considers herself to have a close relationship with the Lord, it was disconcerting. See, I'm a very smart, self-educated (with a few years of college thrown in!) person and for the last 4 years, while I prayed for a miracle cure for Reece, I felt like I was the one who had to figure out what that cure was. I was trusting my intellect and my researching skills and my love of science and medicine to make my son "normal."
And then she asked me something else....
"Have you ever thanked God for the autism? He's the one who has created Reece as He did."
Boy! Thanked God for AUTISM????? Was she NUTS?? Autism was my enemy, my nemesis, my thorn, my broken bridge to the Land of Normal.... Why the HECK would I be THANKFUL for it???? But, another truth began to dawn on my heart.... I daily thank God for my son, Reece, but you know what? Autism, no matter how much I don't want it to be there, is part of Reece. It is part of this family and it is shaping what kind of person I become, what Jeff will become and what kind of women my girls grow up to be. But, you know what? God has allowed autism to become part of Reece and by viewing it as my enemy, am I telling God that what He's created is not good enough???
And, then finally, my last lesson that I learned....
For the last 4 years, I have focused on the BIG PICTURE. What will Reece be like in a couple years.... in 5 years.... in 10 years..... yet, do I have any idea what Reece what kind of man he'll become? No, of course not. I have been so focused on curing him and making him normal so that he can lead a "normal" life as an adult, that I've forgotten that our lives are like a Mozart concerto....
I was a violinist (I say "was" because the violin got put on the backburner once the twins arrived!). I actually had a violin scholarship to college. I was pretty good. But, I remember the feeling when my teacher would hand me a new sheet of music. I'd look at it, gulp, and immediately feel stressed out and discouraged... all before I'd ever picked up my bow! But, if I broke it down, played one note at a time, eventually I got through it and each time I played it, I got a little better and a little better, until finally, it was mastered and ready to perform. I need to remember in life, to take one note at a time, instead of stressing about being able to play the whole piece perfectly the first time through. Only one note, then another, then another, until someday... I'll be standing before the King playing my masterpiece!
I leave you with my new strength that has helped me get through this day...
"Rejoice in the Lord, always. And, again, I say, rejoice!" Phillipians 4:4.
I will REJOICE in Reece and I will REJOICE in autism and I will REJOICE that the Lord chose Jeff and I to go through these daily struggles. Because without these our lives would be too perfect, and how would we ever truly learn to trust?
Friday, September 24, 2010
Vinegar and Baking Soda
I have lots of random thoughts rambling around in my head, but to write a cohesive post, I decided to talk about my most favorite cleaning products! This was a topic of conversation yesterday between myself and my two cousins, whom I help homeschool.
My relationship with vinegar and baking soda started about 5 years ago, right before I found out baby #3 was on the way. I've always been frugal (or a cheapskate, however you'd like to look at it!) and in yet another effort to shave off some household expenses, I decided to begin turning towards cheaper cleaning products, i.e. vinegar. I didn't throw out my regular stuff, mind you, but decided to do some experimenting. But, alas, my experimenting was cut short when Lindy was conceived and I began my 8 month journey through my personal hell, called pregnancy. I was too sick to be creative and experiment, so what little cleaning got done (and there was very little!) was done with my usual, chemical stand-byes.
Enter in autism and the beginning of my new journey to cure it! After doing lots and lots of research into autism and causes and potential cures, I stumbled across a lot of research involving the harmful chemicals that we use everyday and add to our indoor pollution in the name of "cleaning" and "disinfecting." So, in one fell swoop, I threw out all my regular cleaners, bought some spray bottles and gallons of vinegar and forever switched over to the "green" option before "green" was cool!
Vinegar is a disinfectant that is just as effective as most commercial products. And it dissolves lime and makes windows and chrome sparkle. Plus, its totally safe for the kiddos! That was one thing that I loved the most- I could safely clean the bathroom while Lindy sat in her bouncy seat and watched.
I also began using baking soda for my toilet cleaner and degreaser. It also works wonders for clogged drains when mixed (in the drain) with vinegar.
Interestingly enough, after using vinegar for the last 4 years, my kids and I can no longer tolerate the smells of commercial cleaners. We HATE the cleaning aisle at the grocery store and Wal-mart. It makes our eyes burn and our noses stop up. I think most people are desensitized to the chemicals and fragrances in these products and so they don't notice them anymore.
If you're wondering if using only vinegar really does work as an effective disinfectant, well, I can honestly say that my family is rarely sick. We don't have many colds and the kids usually only run a fever once a year. We also haven't been to see the doctor for a sickness in well over a year!
In other quick news, the clonidine for Reece to help his sleeping is a total joke. After taking it for 9 nights, we've seen absolutely NO difference. He still doesn't fall asleep well and he still gets up in the middle of the night. Last night he was up from 2:30 to 5:30 am. On the plus side, his language has just sky rocketed in the last month!!! Don't know why, but, hey, we'll take it! He's actually using a word for his frustrations, too- "dangit!" I told Jeff its a good thing we don't cuss or I wonder what word he would've chosen then :-)
My relationship with vinegar and baking soda started about 5 years ago, right before I found out baby #3 was on the way. I've always been frugal (or a cheapskate, however you'd like to look at it!) and in yet another effort to shave off some household expenses, I decided to begin turning towards cheaper cleaning products, i.e. vinegar. I didn't throw out my regular stuff, mind you, but decided to do some experimenting. But, alas, my experimenting was cut short when Lindy was conceived and I began my 8 month journey through my personal hell, called pregnancy. I was too sick to be creative and experiment, so what little cleaning got done (and there was very little!) was done with my usual, chemical stand-byes.
Enter in autism and the beginning of my new journey to cure it! After doing lots and lots of research into autism and causes and potential cures, I stumbled across a lot of research involving the harmful chemicals that we use everyday and add to our indoor pollution in the name of "cleaning" and "disinfecting." So, in one fell swoop, I threw out all my regular cleaners, bought some spray bottles and gallons of vinegar and forever switched over to the "green" option before "green" was cool!
Vinegar is a disinfectant that is just as effective as most commercial products. And it dissolves lime and makes windows and chrome sparkle. Plus, its totally safe for the kiddos! That was one thing that I loved the most- I could safely clean the bathroom while Lindy sat in her bouncy seat and watched.
I also began using baking soda for my toilet cleaner and degreaser. It also works wonders for clogged drains when mixed (in the drain) with vinegar.
Interestingly enough, after using vinegar for the last 4 years, my kids and I can no longer tolerate the smells of commercial cleaners. We HATE the cleaning aisle at the grocery store and Wal-mart. It makes our eyes burn and our noses stop up. I think most people are desensitized to the chemicals and fragrances in these products and so they don't notice them anymore.
If you're wondering if using only vinegar really does work as an effective disinfectant, well, I can honestly say that my family is rarely sick. We don't have many colds and the kids usually only run a fever once a year. We also haven't been to see the doctor for a sickness in well over a year!
In other quick news, the clonidine for Reece to help his sleeping is a total joke. After taking it for 9 nights, we've seen absolutely NO difference. He still doesn't fall asleep well and he still gets up in the middle of the night. Last night he was up from 2:30 to 5:30 am. On the plus side, his language has just sky rocketed in the last month!!! Don't know why, but, hey, we'll take it! He's actually using a word for his frustrations, too- "dangit!" I told Jeff its a good thing we don't cuss or I wonder what word he would've chosen then :-)
Sunday, September 19, 2010
The Past Month
Yeah, so I thought I'd keep up on this blog a little better than this! But, this last month has had so much going on, I haven't had much time.
The first thing I had going on was the twins' 8th birthday party at the end of August. I have another post in the works detailing the party with pictures of the cakes, so hopefully, I'll feel like finishing that one sometime soon... And then we had our annual camping trip to Noel, MO. The details of which are in the aforementioned post..... Oh, and before all that, Reece started back to school. That's been, um, a disaster. I'm afraid I'm going to have a major fight on my hands to get the school to really do what I want. They seem to think that they don't need to take advice from a state-funded program on autism that helps small schools set up appropriate programs for their autistic students. So, Reece only goes from 1-3 in the afternoons. Going longer stressed him out so badly, it wasn't worth it, and besides, all they really did was babysit him, not educate him! But, that's a rant for another time..... So, after the Labor Day weekend camping trip, we came back and started our school. Elisa is a 2nd grader this year, although most of what she does is on a 3rd-4th grade level. This year I'm pulling out the big guns and using actual curriculum, instead of mostly making up my own like last year. Some of you may be appalled that I didn't use any official curriculum last year, but, seriously, first grade isn't that hard to figure out. She's reading well and has her math facts down pat. We started on memorizing the multiplication table last year, which we'll finish this fall. We also had fun doing random science experiments and we studied all 50 states. She also read books about different people in history. We had a blast!
This year, though, I decided it was time to employ my favorite books from a variety of companies. See, even though, I've only been homeschooling Elisa for a year and a half, I've been helping my aunt homeschool her kids for the last 10 years. Not to mention that when my mom was homeschooling my youngest brothers, she often asked my opinion on the books she was using. So, unlike alot of newer homeschoolers, I've developed my own preferences and have no need to try out a whole bunch of different curriculum.
What are my favorites? Well, we are using Saxon math (which is what Jeff did at Oxford and he loved it, too). For English, I love the Shurley English books. We use Apologia science (I was soooo pumped when they came out with an elementary school program. I've been using their high school science textbooks for the last 8 years and I LOVE them! Elisa picked Anatomy & Physiology for this year). I decided to study world geography this year since we'd hit the US last year, so we're learning about major countries on every continent. And, we using The Learnables Spanish. I took Spanish for 4 years in high school and minored in it in college, but I thought, why wait until high school to begin it? Elisa, and Lindy for that matter, would be much better off learning it at a much younger age. This is my first year for using The Learnables, but I LOVE it! It makes so much more sense than how we learned it in school.... And in addition to all of this, Elisa is learning cursive and I try to incorporate history into our daily lives. For instance, we just got done reading a shortened version of Huck Finn. We read a couple chapters every night before bed. The kids really enjoyed it :-)
So, that's our school, in a nut shell. Lindy is learning her letters and numbers, and also sits in for science, geography, English, and Spanish. I'm soooo glad Jeff has allowed me to do this!
Besides my own kids, I also tutor my two of my cousins (who are freshmen) in English 9 and science (we are doing physical science this year). And an acquaintance of mine is having me tutor her sophomore son in English 10 and science. My days are very full and my scheduling is tight, but I do love teaching!
This is probably the most scheduled my life has been since my own college days. I'm a somewhat organized person, and I like routines, but I also enjoy having flexibility in my routines, but this year, I decided I needed to be more rigid in some areas to lessen the stress. So, in that line of thinking, I made a weekly menu that I decorated, laminated, and hung it on the wall. That way, I know exactly what is for dinner and supper every day and I don't have to think about it. And, its generally the same every week, so its very predictable. I also designed it to use up the odds and ends of meat left in our freezer, to get ready for more beef, pork and deer later in the year. I'm trying very hard to make almost everything from scratch. I already make our own bread all the time, but I've decided to really make an effort to make our own hamburger buns (which I've done in the past, just not consistently) and our own tortillas and refried beans. Someday, I want to be almost 100% grocery store free......
In other news, we've decided to experiment with pharmaceutical drugs with Reece. If you know me very well at all, you know that I tend to be anti-drugs. I realize they have their place, but I also think they are completely over used in our modern lives. Reece has struggled with sleeping for years, with huge ups and downs. We used melatonin for years with him, but over time, it didn't seem to work anymore. This August, I tried some herbal combinations, which really seemed to work, until school started. We think that school stresses him out so badly that he can't sleep well. His school psychologist recommended trying Tenex with him. Apparently, he has another client in Wichita, a 6 year old autistic boy, that started taking this for sleeping and anxiety and its made a huge difference. Well, after talking and praying and researching it, we decided to take him to his developmental ped (who he hadn't seen in 4 years) to see what she thought. She felt like if we could give him a good nights sleep that it would help a lot of the irritability and other autistic behaviors that we see during the day. So, she recommended clonidine. He's been on it for 4 nights and it hasn't made a lick of difference. Plus, yesterday, he wouldn't eat anything! One of the common side effects is nausea, but since Reece doesn't have the greatest communication skills, we don't know if he would really tell us how he was feeling. Anyway, I'm really questioning using drugs on him now.....I mean, if he can't tell us anything, how are we to really know how its effecting him, other than by observation??? Its so difficult and I soooo wish there was a tried-and-true protocol for treating autism...... Or that we were Amish and Reece had never developed autism in the first place..... Did you know the rate of autism among the Amish is zero???? That's right.... there are no documented cases of autism among the Amish.... interesting, huh? But, we're not Amish, we're regular, normal people, and our son did become the 1 in 110 who became autistic. So, we try our best and I'll try harder to keep things updated :-)
The first thing I had going on was the twins' 8th birthday party at the end of August. I have another post in the works detailing the party with pictures of the cakes, so hopefully, I'll feel like finishing that one sometime soon... And then we had our annual camping trip to Noel, MO. The details of which are in the aforementioned post..... Oh, and before all that, Reece started back to school. That's been, um, a disaster. I'm afraid I'm going to have a major fight on my hands to get the school to really do what I want. They seem to think that they don't need to take advice from a state-funded program on autism that helps small schools set up appropriate programs for their autistic students. So, Reece only goes from 1-3 in the afternoons. Going longer stressed him out so badly, it wasn't worth it, and besides, all they really did was babysit him, not educate him! But, that's a rant for another time..... So, after the Labor Day weekend camping trip, we came back and started our school. Elisa is a 2nd grader this year, although most of what she does is on a 3rd-4th grade level. This year I'm pulling out the big guns and using actual curriculum, instead of mostly making up my own like last year. Some of you may be appalled that I didn't use any official curriculum last year, but, seriously, first grade isn't that hard to figure out. She's reading well and has her math facts down pat. We started on memorizing the multiplication table last year, which we'll finish this fall. We also had fun doing random science experiments and we studied all 50 states. She also read books about different people in history. We had a blast!
This year, though, I decided it was time to employ my favorite books from a variety of companies. See, even though, I've only been homeschooling Elisa for a year and a half, I've been helping my aunt homeschool her kids for the last 10 years. Not to mention that when my mom was homeschooling my youngest brothers, she often asked my opinion on the books she was using. So, unlike alot of newer homeschoolers, I've developed my own preferences and have no need to try out a whole bunch of different curriculum.
What are my favorites? Well, we are using Saxon math (which is what Jeff did at Oxford and he loved it, too). For English, I love the Shurley English books. We use Apologia science (I was soooo pumped when they came out with an elementary school program. I've been using their high school science textbooks for the last 8 years and I LOVE them! Elisa picked Anatomy & Physiology for this year). I decided to study world geography this year since we'd hit the US last year, so we're learning about major countries on every continent. And, we using The Learnables Spanish. I took Spanish for 4 years in high school and minored in it in college, but I thought, why wait until high school to begin it? Elisa, and Lindy for that matter, would be much better off learning it at a much younger age. This is my first year for using The Learnables, but I LOVE it! It makes so much more sense than how we learned it in school.... And in addition to all of this, Elisa is learning cursive and I try to incorporate history into our daily lives. For instance, we just got done reading a shortened version of Huck Finn. We read a couple chapters every night before bed. The kids really enjoyed it :-)
So, that's our school, in a nut shell. Lindy is learning her letters and numbers, and also sits in for science, geography, English, and Spanish. I'm soooo glad Jeff has allowed me to do this!
Besides my own kids, I also tutor my two of my cousins (who are freshmen) in English 9 and science (we are doing physical science this year). And an acquaintance of mine is having me tutor her sophomore son in English 10 and science. My days are very full and my scheduling is tight, but I do love teaching!
This is probably the most scheduled my life has been since my own college days. I'm a somewhat organized person, and I like routines, but I also enjoy having flexibility in my routines, but this year, I decided I needed to be more rigid in some areas to lessen the stress. So, in that line of thinking, I made a weekly menu that I decorated, laminated, and hung it on the wall. That way, I know exactly what is for dinner and supper every day and I don't have to think about it. And, its generally the same every week, so its very predictable. I also designed it to use up the odds and ends of meat left in our freezer, to get ready for more beef, pork and deer later in the year. I'm trying very hard to make almost everything from scratch. I already make our own bread all the time, but I've decided to really make an effort to make our own hamburger buns (which I've done in the past, just not consistently) and our own tortillas and refried beans. Someday, I want to be almost 100% grocery store free......
In other news, we've decided to experiment with pharmaceutical drugs with Reece. If you know me very well at all, you know that I tend to be anti-drugs. I realize they have their place, but I also think they are completely over used in our modern lives. Reece has struggled with sleeping for years, with huge ups and downs. We used melatonin for years with him, but over time, it didn't seem to work anymore. This August, I tried some herbal combinations, which really seemed to work, until school started. We think that school stresses him out so badly that he can't sleep well. His school psychologist recommended trying Tenex with him. Apparently, he has another client in Wichita, a 6 year old autistic boy, that started taking this for sleeping and anxiety and its made a huge difference. Well, after talking and praying and researching it, we decided to take him to his developmental ped (who he hadn't seen in 4 years) to see what she thought. She felt like if we could give him a good nights sleep that it would help a lot of the irritability and other autistic behaviors that we see during the day. So, she recommended clonidine. He's been on it for 4 nights and it hasn't made a lick of difference. Plus, yesterday, he wouldn't eat anything! One of the common side effects is nausea, but since Reece doesn't have the greatest communication skills, we don't know if he would really tell us how he was feeling. Anyway, I'm really questioning using drugs on him now.....I mean, if he can't tell us anything, how are we to really know how its effecting him, other than by observation??? Its so difficult and I soooo wish there was a tried-and-true protocol for treating autism...... Or that we were Amish and Reece had never developed autism in the first place..... Did you know the rate of autism among the Amish is zero???? That's right.... there are no documented cases of autism among the Amish.... interesting, huh? But, we're not Amish, we're regular, normal people, and our son did become the 1 in 110 who became autistic. So, we try our best and I'll try harder to keep things updated :-)
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
It's been 4 years.......
Hard to believe, but this month of August, 2010 marks 4 years that we've had an autistic child. He was actually showing major, huge signs at 3 1/2 years, but it took until almost 4 years old before we actually heard that dreaded word fall from the specialist's mouth. Reece will turn 8 in a week and looking back on our journey with this special boy, I honestly thought that by now he'd be cured. In fact, when he got his diagnosis, I was sure that by age 7 we might be struggling with some minor speech articulation and maybe a little reading trouble, but never in a million years did I think he would still be..... autistic. Have I lost all hope? No. Naive or ignorant I am not, but when it comes to this mysterious disorder, if I give up then I've lost him.
It seems so sad to me because as Reece's baby and toddler years get farther and farther behind us, I find myself grasping to remember the boy before the autism. Sometimes I see him, but other days, I don't. I find myself struggling with jealousy of parents whose little boys are fine and normal. These parents will never have to wonder if their boy will ever be able to live as an independent man. They can confidently dream about what he will become without wondering "Will he be one of those people that can only sack groceries?"
These past couple weeks have been wonderful at some times and soooo frustrating at others. Sometimes Reece can act so NORMAL! Like when he cleaned and polished his off-road trike before he took it for a spin. Or when I caught him talking to himself and making funny faces in the mirror. Or when he was recounting the story of the turtle biting him or when I had to stop him from "riding his bike to Grandma's house". But, for every "normal" moment, there are 4 autistic ones. Like when he lets out a blood curdling "autistic" scream in front of a visitor. Or when he gets so mad that all he can do is stim, stim, stim. Or when he gets into things, just like a 2 year old would do. I could go on and on and on.
One thing I have learned though, is that I think I appreciate those "normal" moments much more than the average parent. When you're not really sure what will become of your little guy, you treasure all the wonderful little things. You call your husband at work, just to tell him some little sentence that Reece said. Or you take a picture of him washing his trike. Or you sit and savor the sound of his interaction with his twin sister. These are things that I think I would take for granted if I had never had a special needs son.
When I first became pregnant with the twins and we found out that we were having a boy and a girl, I just assumed everything would be fine and they would perfectly normal children, just like my siblings and me. It never once occurred to me that God would have a completely different plan for Jeff and me. I use to wonder "Why me? Why does He think I can handle this but not other mothers?" But, after 4 years, I've learned that I may never know "why" but I do know that I CAN! And, even though I still have all the hopes and dreams for Reece that every mother has for her little boy, I have learned that if he never reads, if he never lives independently, if he never has children of his own, none of that really matters. The only things that really truly matters is that Jeff and I teach him about Jesus and his saving grace. God will give Reece the understanding that is sufficient, but, unless Reece hears us pray, listens to us read the Bible and sees faith in other fellow Christians, he will be lost. So, that is my number one priority. I will never stop in my quest to cure him, but I won't ask "Why me?" nearly as often! And I will treasure this wonderful, unique, unusual and oh-so-special little boy that God decided to entrust us with.
It seems so sad to me because as Reece's baby and toddler years get farther and farther behind us, I find myself grasping to remember the boy before the autism. Sometimes I see him, but other days, I don't. I find myself struggling with jealousy of parents whose little boys are fine and normal. These parents will never have to wonder if their boy will ever be able to live as an independent man. They can confidently dream about what he will become without wondering "Will he be one of those people that can only sack groceries?"
These past couple weeks have been wonderful at some times and soooo frustrating at others. Sometimes Reece can act so NORMAL! Like when he cleaned and polished his off-road trike before he took it for a spin. Or when I caught him talking to himself and making funny faces in the mirror. Or when he was recounting the story of the turtle biting him or when I had to stop him from "riding his bike to Grandma's house". But, for every "normal" moment, there are 4 autistic ones. Like when he lets out a blood curdling "autistic" scream in front of a visitor. Or when he gets so mad that all he can do is stim, stim, stim. Or when he gets into things, just like a 2 year old would do. I could go on and on and on.
One thing I have learned though, is that I think I appreciate those "normal" moments much more than the average parent. When you're not really sure what will become of your little guy, you treasure all the wonderful little things. You call your husband at work, just to tell him some little sentence that Reece said. Or you take a picture of him washing his trike. Or you sit and savor the sound of his interaction with his twin sister. These are things that I think I would take for granted if I had never had a special needs son.
When I first became pregnant with the twins and we found out that we were having a boy and a girl, I just assumed everything would be fine and they would perfectly normal children, just like my siblings and me. It never once occurred to me that God would have a completely different plan for Jeff and me. I use to wonder "Why me? Why does He think I can handle this but not other mothers?" But, after 4 years, I've learned that I may never know "why" but I do know that I CAN! And, even though I still have all the hopes and dreams for Reece that every mother has for her little boy, I have learned that if he never reads, if he never lives independently, if he never has children of his own, none of that really matters. The only things that really truly matters is that Jeff and I teach him about Jesus and his saving grace. God will give Reece the understanding that is sufficient, but, unless Reece hears us pray, listens to us read the Bible and sees faith in other fellow Christians, he will be lost. So, that is my number one priority. I will never stop in my quest to cure him, but I won't ask "Why me?" nearly as often! And I will treasure this wonderful, unique, unusual and oh-so-special little boy that God decided to entrust us with.
Monday, August 16, 2010
Country Fun- Swimming at a Crik!
Today was a good day! We got to go swimming in a local crik (yes, I spelled that right! I grew up ALWAYS referring to "creeks" as "criks." A country/farm thing, I guess!). Its actually located in the neighboring county, but we didn't mind the half hour drive. Its a gorgeous place! The water actually runs under an antique stone bridge and the swimming area is extremely deep, but there was a very large area where it was very shallow, which was great for Lindy and for us moms just to sit in and visit. The crik is located on private land, but the farmer that owns it lets the public swim there. Isn't that awesome? I'm not sure I would be so generous...
Anyway, the kids all wore life jackets and had so much fun playing and floating! There's even an old rope tied to a giant oak for swinging out on. I didn't even attempt it; I'm sure my upper body strength is not what it use to be, plus I had a very bad experience once as a teenager jumping off a rope into our pond (I got awful rope burn on my arm and decided maybe jumping off a rope wasn't as much fun as people made it out to be!). Amazingly, though, Elisa actually did it! She's become a very good swimmer this summer and passed the deep end test at the public pool, but she's been too scared to actually go off the diving board. I honestly was sure she would chicken out with the rope!
Anyway, the kids all wore life jackets and had so much fun playing and floating! There's even an old rope tied to a giant oak for swinging out on. I didn't even attempt it; I'm sure my upper body strength is not what it use to be, plus I had a very bad experience once as a teenager jumping off a rope into our pond (I got awful rope burn on my arm and decided maybe jumping off a rope wasn't as much fun as people made it out to be!). Amazingly, though, Elisa actually did it! She's become a very good swimmer this summer and passed the deep end test at the public pool, but she's been too scared to actually go off the diving board. I honestly was sure she would chicken out with the rope!
We plan on going back at the end of the week.
In other little news, I made a sleep tincture today for Reece. What is a tincture, you might ask? Well, its a concentrated herbal syrup. Its more potent than a tea. They are very easy to make in the crock pot. Reece has been having a VERY difficult time sleeping this summer (not uncommon for autistic children). He would be put to bed at 9 pm (and we have a very strict bedtime routine), but then would proceed to get out of bed, literally, every 10 seconds. So, our policy is you go straight back to bed. I would take him back to bed like this until about 11:30pm or so. Oh, he'd get spanked, too (we believe in Biblical discipline). Then, he'd sleep for a few hours and wake up about 3 am. So, I'd get up again and put him back to bed. Some nights he'd go back so sleep, but many nights he wouldn't! It was awful! At first I was sooooo tired, but like what happens when you have a newborn, my body adjusted. Sure, it wasn't fun, but I could still function during the day. I figured that eventually, Reece would get the idea that I was more stubborn than he and so he'd stay in bed and sleep all night. He does have spurts where he's a very good sleeper. Anyway, after continuing this routine for the entire month of July, I decided to try some herbs that I'd never used on him before. I love using herbs and, although I'm no expert, I research them and have learned a lot and have seen how well they can work! So, I had this stuff from the Bulk Herb Store (check them out online; wonderful place!) called a Snooze Tincture. It was actually the dried herbs (chamomile, oatstraw, lemon balm, hops, passion flower) mixed together. You add vegetable glycerin and a little water and cook it for 3 days. But, before I went to the trouble of making a whole tincture, I decided to just make a hot tea for him using these herbs. Reece loves hot tea! Well, coincidence or not, the first night we tried this, he only got out of bed twice and slept all night! Hhhhmmmm..... maybe we were on to something. But, I wasn't a believer yet. So, for a whole week now we've been drinking the tea and he only gets out of bed about twice and only sometimes wakes up at night, but if does, he always falls back asleep! During the day, its like I have a whole different child! His language has improved and he's not NEARLY as moody as he had been. Then, to top it all off, tonight I tried a very small dose of the tincture AND had him drink the tea, and he NEVER got up once!!!! So, we'll if he sleeps all night.... let me tell you, though, just to have him stay in bed and fall asleep right away is a blessing :-) So, I'm off to enjoy my peaceful and relaxing evening..... Good night!
Friday, August 13, 2010
My First One.....
After much thought and prayer, I decided to join in the blogging phenomenon. As my first official post, I'd thought I'd first give a more detailed background of the Donley family!
First and foremost, we love the Lord and do our best to follow Him in everything we do and say. Of course, we are not perfect, but our goal in life is to lead our children (and hopefully others!) to Him by our example in our everyday lives. We don't lead a charmed life (as you will learn if you decide to follow my blog!), but we know that "all things work for the good of those who love Him and who are called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28).
He's a 5th generation farmer in the same area that his ancestors settled in 1871. He's a workaholic and a great father and husband :-) After farming fulltime for 2 1/2 years, he went back to being a machinist at a local factory in a neighboring town and farms in his off time. He's been back at his town job for almost 3 years. He likes it, but he loves farming more and our goal is to farm fulltime again in the near future. Unfortunately, he works second shift, so the kids and I have learned to have our own afternoon and evening routines without him. Basically, his life consists of 40 hours a week at his town job and 40 hours a week on the farm. Needless to say, we have no hobbies, no social life and very little downtime, but we don't mind.... usually!
My oldest daughter, Elisa, is in the picture with me, because I have absolutely no pictures of me alone! I'm always the one behind the camera :-) I have been a stay-at-home mom since my twins were born. I was raised on a big farm a few miles east of where we live now. I loved living and working on my dad's farm and always wanted to marry a farmer! As I've gotten older, my interests have included nutrition, herbs, gardening, cooking from scratch, raising animals for meat and eggs, and autism. I would have loved to have been a pioneer woman back in the 1800's!
Pictured with her, is her newly acquired Indian baby that she bought while on our recent vacation to the Black Hills. This girl is in LOVE with baby dolls!!! She has been obsessed with playing mommy since she was 10 months old (she started walking at 9 months, so she subsequently, acted much older than her actual age!). She really wants a real baby in our family so she can take care of it, but, I told her, that unfortunately, that won't be happening :-( She also is into Polly Pockets and making up elaborate stories. It wouldn't surprise me if she's a writer someday.... Lindy acts very old for her age, most of the time, which I think comes from being around her older sister. She's into all things GIRL and for the last year has refused to wear any other clothing, but dresses! That is soooo unlike her tomboy mother :-) She has her own opinion about everything and she is very much a mama's girl, although, the older she gets the more time she likes to spend with her daddy.
So, that is the end of my first post and I hope you've got a good handle on what our family is all about! I don't know how often I'll post on this blog; I'm guessing it will vary a lot depending on what's going on around here.... so, talk to ya later!!!
First and foremost, we love the Lord and do our best to follow Him in everything we do and say. Of course, we are not perfect, but our goal in life is to lead our children (and hopefully others!) to Him by our example in our everyday lives. We don't lead a charmed life (as you will learn if you decide to follow my blog!), but we know that "all things work for the good of those who love Him and who are called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28).
The head of the Donley family is Jeff....
He's a 5th generation farmer in the same area that his ancestors settled in 1871. He's a workaholic and a great father and husband :-) After farming fulltime for 2 1/2 years, he went back to being a machinist at a local factory in a neighboring town and farms in his off time. He's been back at his town job for almost 3 years. He likes it, but he loves farming more and our goal is to farm fulltime again in the near future. Unfortunately, he works second shift, so the kids and I have learned to have our own afternoon and evening routines without him. Basically, his life consists of 40 hours a week at his town job and 40 hours a week on the farm. Needless to say, we have no hobbies, no social life and very little downtime, but we don't mind.... usually!
I, of course, am the second in command.
This is our son, Reece Jefferson.
He is the oldest of the twins (by 4 minutes :-) His main love in life is farming. This kid can sit on a tractor or combine for 8 hours and never fall asleep or act bored. He absolutely loves to go anywhere and everywhere with his daddy or his Grandpa Jim (Jeff's dad, who farms the Donley farm fulltime). Reece had a rough start in life with an 8 day stay in the NICU and a year of physical therapy. After he met all his baby milestones on time and "tested out" of physical therapy by his first birthday, we were sure the worst was behind us. Unfortunately, we were very wrong! Our autism story isn't much different from everyone else's. We noticed around 18 months that he'd quit talking, but other than that, there were no major warning signs. He was in speech therapy at age 2, but it wasn't until he was 3 1/2, that he really spiraled into autism. Overnight, literally, we lost him. He began stimming incessantly and refused to make eye contact or interact with any of us. After waiting months to see a specialist, we got his official diagnosis right around his 4th birthday. He's considered mildly autistic, but, I've learned, that to a large extent, autism is autism, no matter how mild or severe. We love our little guy dearly, but its been a very difficult journey. We have very few resources in our area to deal with this disability, so we and the school do the best we can. I still have hope that someday Reece will be able to live a normal life and I even pray for his future wife :-) That's why I chose that verse to be in the heading of this blog. I know, without a doubt, that God has given Reece a hope and a future. You will learn so much more about Reece and our struggles with autism, but we try so hard to not let autism rule our life.
This is Elisa Ray, Reece's twin sister and our oldest daughter...
This girl is my right hand man and I don't know how I ever got along with her! She is so smart and helpful :-) She's very creative and her number one interest in life is art. It seems like she's always in the middle of some creative project. She's wonderful with Reece, too. She and Lindy (our youngest) are best friends and are always using their imaginations! We started homeschooling her a year and a half ago, when she was halfway through kindergarten. We missed having her around and poor Jeff would go all week and not see her, due to his second shift schedule. Throw in the fact that she was ahead of her peers academically and was learning and picking up things that were very un-Biblical, we decided homeschooling was a better option for us. She and I have so much fun "doing" school together! She's one of those self-motivated learners and can't wait to get started everyday. She also loves to bake and since she can read now, she bakes cookies, brownies, rolls, whatever she wants, without any help from me!
And last, but definitely not least, is our "baby", Lindy Sue...
So, that is the end of my first post and I hope you've got a good handle on what our family is all about! I don't know how often I'll post on this blog; I'm guessing it will vary a lot depending on what's going on around here.... so, talk to ya later!!!
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